So, how do you feel? Like abandoned french fries in the dark of the night, getting crushed by footsteps and car tires.

It seems like I'm constantly looking for something
or waiting for something.

Waiting for you to call me back

looking for something else.

We'll always be different.
And I think,
one day,
that might ruin,
at the very least,
one of us.

I never knew what I wanted.
I was never positive I could keep all those promises,
the many many promises you made me say yes to.

I don't want to feel trapped anymore.
I don't want you to touch me.
Don't touch me,
you never listen
when I say those words.

I just want to feel some freedom.
So I don't have to feel like this anymore.

It's not your fault though,
not anyone's fault...

but mine.
of course.

We just have different opinions on things.

Just forget about me
like you do
when


you're


drunk.

That is where I will die.

You were oblivious
to the pain I suffered.

You are still ignorant
and bitter.

Ever since I was young...

You have not changed, and you never will.

I've lost count of how many times...










I've thought about this before.



Finally I will feel...
something besides
this.

I need to feel the cold wash over me.

This Is Not For You.

Where are you, beauty?

Don't make promises you can't keep.

Don't LIE to me.

I hate you, blame.
But someone has to take it.
And I guess that will be me.

I want life.
I want to create, I want to express, WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?

Why doesn't anyone understand?

Why do you all have to judge, and make conclusions of things you know nothing about?
SHUT UP! I DON'T CARE.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
NO FUCKING CLUE.

I wish I could tell you.

Get me out of here!

When did this start?
Why am I such a stupid, sensitive, teenage girl.
He's a normal teenage boy.
I should just stop thinking about it.
But I can't,
I can't get it out of my mind
because my heart still feels broken.

Forgive...
Forget...
I want to.

I want to believe it...I want to be able to trust...But I don't want to get hurt.
It's my own fault,
I'm trying to hurt myself, and I know it.

I just want to start over...
I don't want to be who I am anymore.
I don't even want this.

Why can't I be that girl in that photo? I want to escape.
I feel like it's coming to an end,
and we're both going to change,
and we'll part ways...
That this is going to be life changing.

I'm worried we won't have time for each other.
I'm worried we'll drink too much beer,
or do too much drugs.

WHY CAN'T I BE GODDAMN GOOD ENOUGH? STOP SAYING I'M BEAUTIFUL.
Stop lying to me,
please.

I am just a wallflower.

Alice In Wonderland

I saw Tim Burton's Alice In Wonderland in 3D this past Saturday and I must say that I enjoyed it quite a bit! It was so visually pleasing and terribly fun to watch. I love the way Tim Burton made this movie. I know, it's gotten some negative reviews...and I can see why. A lot of people are expecting the original story.
I really did like this film but must admit that some of the characters weren't as fantastical as I thought they would be. The Mad Hatter (Johnny Depp) for example, I thought he was going to be a little crazier....but I must admit that Mr. Depp did a WONDERFUL job as always. He did the character so well. As well as the Red Queen (Helena Bonham Carter), she was super fun. I absolutely loved her in this film.
I really loved the way Burton set this film up, the storyline, the characters, the setting...who doesn't adore the setting? You can definitely tell who this film was directed by :PMia Wasikowska also did a pretty good job as Alice, I quite liked her :)
And finally...the attire. I AM IN LOVE WITH THE ATTIRE OF THIS FILM. So beautiful and wonderfully done, especially when she shrinks and grows. And the Mad Hatter's too. Maybe I just love Victorian clothing.

So, I do own both the original Alice In Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass...and probably should have read it before I saw the film but I didn't have a chance to. Hopefully I'll get around to that after I finish reading all the Sherlock Holmes short stories.

I apologize that this isn't a well done review.

Love,
-Wallflower.

Paper Heart

I just saw the film Paper Heart starring Charlyne Yi and Michael Cera. I'm still not sure as to whether it was a documentary or not...but anyhow, it's a cute movie. It's a film about Charlyne who goes on a trip across America interviewing people about the subject of love.

I find Michael Cera really interesting..I haven't seen all of his film, only this, Juno, and Superbad but I can't decide whether he's a really good actor...or if that's just how he is?
I have to admit, he's quite adorable, but...he's not just cute. There seems to be a lot more to him than that.

So, anyway, watch this movie. It's quite...heartwarming...in the sense that you can fully understand the characters. I'd love to hear what you think.

Blood On Our Hands

Can this just be considered a sort of journal from now on? I'm sorry, but I never really saw what I wrote as poetry, not that I'm not grateful for the wonderful comments I received, but I won't always be able to express myself in that way.

I never really thought other people were going to read what I say...

I don't really know why I have two blogs now either.

Sometimes there's just so MUCH emotion in me, words can't even describe how I feel!
Of course I know that happens to everyone...

But right now I just want to say
thanks, for sparing a few moments of your life to look at my blogs,
and I'm terribly sorry that they're complete shit.
I am not looking for sympathy or empathy, this is coming from as if no one else will be reading this, as are all the my other posts.

So, I hope you enjoy the rest of your day!

Feel.

Standing,
my feet standing on the cold sand.
The light wind...gently blowing...
I can feel it wisping through my hair ever so slightly...
skimming delicately past my skin,

While I stand.
In the cold sand.

Staring

at the waves rolling in...

As the sun breaks way
through the clouds.

And I stand.

Basking in the glorious sunlight.

Soaking up as much hope as possible...

Love always,
Wallflower.

P.S. You are my sunshine.